How to make your mind your friend

Who has never made a small mistake and heard his mind say something like "your failure!", "you always make mistakes!" or "is an idiot!" for example? Our mind is master in judging, evaluating and criticizing us, and in ways we would never speak to someone close and dear.

We pressure and criticize ourselves in a rigid and cruel way, mentally punishing us when we "fail" in something. When we care about someone special, even if that person misses or fails, we strive to welcome the suffering and point out the error delicately. But why do we not have this behavior with ourselves?

We do not need our mind to be our enemy!

In times of suffering, when we recognize mistakes and difficulties, we do not need to punish ourselves further. We can work our mind to be our close friend, and this is the power of self-compassion!

It’s about directing self-compassion to ourselves, treating us as we would treat our best friend! It’s about understanding that suffering, imperfection and failures are part of human life and that this does not make you less worthy of love and care!

Self-compassion is also a protective factor against abusive relationships, because knowing that you have the right to make mistakes and still be worthy of understanding and compassion is a way of perceiving violence.

But then, how to develop self-compassion?

The first step is to realize that your mind being evil and recognize that what is said is not true, are only nonsense we say to ourselves.

Then we can think "what would I say if I were my best friend in this situation?" and treat us the same loving way.

Finally, practicing self-compassion with guided meditations can help us a lot to feel self-compassion and train this skill!

Remember: imperfection is human, and we are all worthy of love, especially in difficult times.